BottleAbuser is an Ungrateful Douchebag

The Sixth Commandment of the TL.net Ten Commandments states that "Thou Shall Respect Forum Veterans." Agree with it or not, the quality of the TL.net forums and the actions of the Moderators are greatly influenced by this statement. Veterans are respect and given more privileges. Those that make threads, upload VODs, and do things for the site are respected even more. Saying anything even remotely bad to yakii was an automatic ban.

An anonymous source says that BottleAbuser recommended that VOD uploader and stream guru Corinthos be banned (quote from GGC chat):

"who was that dude? a fucked up version of travis? why do idiots like corinthos come to tl? wouldn't they get banned in like 100 posts"

To answer the question, Corinthos came to TL for the past three years to upload VODs and provide live progaming streams that greatly benefit the community. A better question is why do you come to TL, BottleAbuser? To blow up at longtime contributors over DotA? Is your ego so enormous that you can't stand losing one UMS game and feel the need to insult people? So what if Corinthos is a newbie at DotA? TLGG would love to play DotA or StarCraft or rock paper scissors with Corinthos no matter how badly he sucks, and the same goes for other uploaders like zatic and Emlary or coders like Pop and R1CH. He's earned that right.

BottleAbuser is an ungrateful douchebag. That much is established. However, the question remains, can he be banned from TL.net for something he said or did outside of the forums? The Mods have banned hackers and abusers before, and they've also banned people for extremely bad behavior in the IRC or TL-West channel. Thus, there's no reason why someone who is a jerk to Corinthos in a game full of TL members can't be banned.

TLGG hopes that BottleAbuser and people like him get banned, and soon!

[R] Facebook Friends

TL.net's favorite insecure self-loather and whipping boy made a triumphant return to creating threads. Recently, Rpf took a leave of absence from the forums to become a lobbyist for the National Rifle Association, playing a large role in organizing the opposition to District of Columbia's handgun ban.

The thread posted a screenshot and asked for computer help, but in the captured screen, Rpf left open a background window of his facebook profile. While Rpf took the time to black out his last name, the screenshot revealed the number of facebook friends he has (over 200) as well as his profile wall. One wall comment by an alleged male friend asked Rpf out for drinks. The original image was saved by Bill307, Hot_Bid, and thedeadhaji after Rpf edited it out. The thread was most likely a poorly executed attempt by Rpf to demonstrate that he was popular, but backfired as users quickly discovered his true identity along with a pornography bookmark.

Several users posted their own screenshot parodies, including ones starring Scarlett Johansson and Jesus, along with one featuring many desktop easter eggs. However, the real fun began when Moderators online at the time began rapidly changing the title of the thread to attract more views. TL.net became a tabloid for an hour.

Here's a list of the "Tabloid titles," compiled from posts in the thread:

• Blizzcon is Sold Out =(
• Savior on TL Attack
• [HELP] i nailed she-ra and she called me skeletor
• Britney Spears Dies of Heart Attack
• [O]Blizzard Announces Starcraft 2 Release Date
• [idea] TL Escort Service - Hookers for Nerds
• Klazart goes to Korea
• [Q] Can I sue a girl for dumping me
• PuertoRican Deported from Korea
• [news] police dog attacks allegedly gay oak tree
• [Live] sex with my girlfriend
• [O] Official - Teamliquid Acquired by myMYM
• [help] parents resent me after sex change
• [R] New Penis
• ilnp smurfed for JF
• [VEGETARIANS] Can Eat Cereal and Omlettes
• TLGG identiy discovered
• Cooking [NWS]
• lilsusie is engaged!
• lilsusie is engaged! [NWS]
• [O] Incontrol to Mod
• thisiscombatexrecordinganotherfpvod
• Patch 1.16
• ICCUP HACKED!
• [H] Raping My Sister
• [Q] am i sad all the time because God is a girl?
• [news] Incontrol concedes argument
• Boxer switches to WC3
• [R] Black People
• [G] Black People
• GG.net merges with SC2GG, becomes SC2GGGG
• [Live] CJ SHIRTS ON SALE
• Boxer Retires
  
• [help] hypnotizing a girl into liking me
• Korea Legalizes Assrape
• KESPA Bans Foreigners - Idra To Become Sous-Chef
• FBH murdered in arson conspiracy
• [O]Hanbit -> MySpace Stars
• Lesbian wins fish eating contest
  
• [O]Gene has a Hot Date Tomorrow
• [H] Klan Recruitment

You can imagine the excitement here when TLGG imagined the pure gossip potential of some of those titles. There were even two references to this blog! Thanks TL.net for a good time, and we wish Rpf good luck in his quest for facebook acceptance.

Roommate of Artosis Speaks

As you may have heard by now, Artosis is in Korea commentating for IEG. While we know Artosis is Jewish, plays Terran, and casted TSL, little is known about his roommate, PuertoRican (aside from his nationality).

PuertoRican was a former TeamLiquid staff member who posted news about the non-Korean scene. He has since migrated to IEG's competitor site SCforALL, and organizes progamer events like the MST and the ongoing Spirit tournament.

Our sources within the TL Staff reveal conflicting viewpoints about PuertoRican.

One staff member described PuertoRican:

"He tries hard and has a baffoonish charm. I wish him the best at IEG."

However, another staff member replied:

"PuertoRican is the single largest mistake in the history of TeamLiquid.net."

Aside from organizing events, PuertoRican possesses a wealth of insider knowledge and is a vital part in the information exchange between the e-sports scene in Korea and its international fanbase.

When asked about the whereabouts of IEG photographer NeverGG, PuertoRican said:

"She is teaching class right now. You want me to hook you up with her or somethin?"

PuertoRican also commented on top Spirit contender IefNaij, who recently lost a showmatch to STX progamer Kal:

"Iefnaij got outplayed in early game, looked like a newb you fuck with on east server."

On the subject of his new roommate Artosis, PuertoRican said:

"Artosis is vegetarian, not vegan. He still eats eggs and a few cock sandwiches at night. He doesn't know about the latter."

We at TLGG love new information, and we've learned a few new things about NeverGG, IefNaij, and Artosis. Nevergg is single, and PuertoRican can get you a date. IefNaij is worse than Kal. And Artosis can have cereal and an omlette for breakfast, because the core difference between vegetarians and vegans is that vegans can't eat any animal products like milk and eggs. Also, Artosis is unaware that he performs fellatio on PuertoRican at night.

We look forward to more quotes from the PuertoRican in the future. (All quotes from IRC)

World Tasteless Foundation

Find out more about the newest charity that is sweeping the TL forums: the World Tasteless Foundation (WTF). Thank you for considering a Tasteless donation today, every dollar fuels its mission of doing whatever it takes to relieve and prevent people from suffering, if people meant only Tasteless.

Donate now at www.tastelessgaming.com, a website created through the intensive labor of volunteers at no cost.

Tasteless wanting a free website:
"I need people with web design skills. I want a web page where people can get access to all my material without having to use google or thumb through different threads. I can't do this alone. I need help from other people and i'm looking for volunteers."

But less than a week earlier, in an "Ask Tasteless" thread:

ATeddyBear said:

"if given the opportunity to cast tsl, would you do it? <3"

Tasteless said:

"yes if i'm paid. by the way, when i say stuff like that, it's not because i'm a greedy dick. it's because overall game casters are not paid enough and i refuse to cast events unless i'm paid; this is to push the industry towards a more professional level."

Do not, by any means, replace "game casters" with "web designers" and "i'm not a greedy dick" with "i am a greedy dick" in the above quote.

Donate today! Take advantage of the Tastele$ Birthday $pecial, where you just donate twice the amount you normally would.

Artosis said:

"awesome site gw! its tasteless's bday everyone go donate a dollar"

The World Tasteless Foundation, fueling the Tasteless hypocrisy train all the way to the bank.

Think of the Children!

It was an ordinary WCG USA flamefest going on, with the usual cast of characters. Media vs Louder Round 2 was on like donkey kong:

Idra said:

"Stop acting like you deserve it because you're a horrible player and you aren't fooling anyone."

Louder said:

"Command of the facts clearly isn't your strong suit. Stick to gaming, you're significantly better at it."

Idra said:

"You're bad at forming coherent arguments, better stick to cheating your way into broodwar tournaments."

But when Louder said:

"Shouldn't you be scrubbing the Korean's toilets right now?"

Idra came back with this volley:

"and id much rather be cleaning korean toilets than ... raising a bunch of little brats who are gonna turn out as fucked up as their piece of shit father."

And suddenly nobody is laughing:

"damnit just by reading this last post by idra , i feel bad for louder."
"ok this is going too far, you guys need to stop posting on this thread."
"you definitely don't have kids, because you would never say that."
"you never talk about kids, because any parent would go berserk"
"dont' run your fucking mouth about peoples kids"
"there are lines you don't cross"

And even paragraph long rants from no-name Zeller:

"Seriously? bringing someones children into an argument about a computer game. Get real dude, dont fucking talk about someones kids. I dont care how bad this dude wronged you or a friend on Starcraft , you do NOT talk about someones kids. Thats low fuckin character right there, you know you would never say that in person because thatd be your ass."

Apparently Idra "went there." While TLGG sees nothing wrong with talking about someone's kids, TL and WCG USA seem to have a huge moral problem with it. 24/7 trashtalk, abusing, hacking, flaming, that's all fine and dandy, but talking about someone's kids!? Oh no you didn't.

But what if there was an unwritten rule that you kids were off limits? Imagine all the paradoxes this would create:

1. If Louder's kids flamed Idra, could he flame them back?
2. If Louder's kids met Idra's kids, would everyone just be quiet?
3. Can Louder's kid flame Idra to Idra's father?
4. If Louder's kids are playing Monopoly, and one takes a bathroom break, would the other kid petition to have his brother disqualified?

Moral of the story, if you don't want to get insulted through your kids on the internet, don't have kids. Or don't advertise that you have kids to the online gaming community. Or even better, when you have kids, stop participating in internet flamewars with teenagers.

Idra WCG 2008: ilnp redux?

Idra is not unfamiliar with special treatment. Since traveling to Korea to train on eStro, TL’s favorite pale redheaded egoist has been allowed to play from Korea for the TSL, and now apparently will be allowed to compete online in WCG USA without having to fly back to the United States. The obvious concern is that he could have a Korean semipro or pro to play for him.

As Media members and groupies are quick to point out, Idra doesn’t need a Korean sub. His improvement since arriving in Seoul is obvious: after being bounced out of his first Courage tournament in the first round, Idra made the quarterfinals in his second try, losing 1-2 to the eventual winner, zergstyle[gm]. But the fact that Idra fully deserves a slot does not mean he should receive a huge edge over the other players: not having to travel. In fact, since Idra already has a huge advantage over the other players in practice quality and volume, you could argue that he should be the last guy who gets this free pass. He’s the only participant in WCG USA whose job is "get better at StarCraft" and it's understandable when weaker players like Sadist complain, especially when the same online exemption isn't provided to others.

TLGG wishes it was around in 2003 during the original ilnp WDT scandal, but it’s never too late to take a look back. For those that aren’t familiar, WDT was a ladder where players paid an entry fee ($20) to participate in a tournament with large prizes. Ilnp (aka Dudey), a TL.net forum member, won the tournament, defeating many well-known top foreigners in the process. However, his tournament matches were played with triple the APM and a significantly higher skill than the community has seen from this player. It’s become widely accepted that ilnp struck a deal with a Korean pro to play for him and split the money. Remember, this was a time before hotkey fingerprinting was established and people believed it was possible to transform your play overnight.

Here are a few quick and dirty links about the whole incident:

Ilnp’s side of the story
Testie’s accusation
Nazgul’s response
Rekrul revealing it was Oversky

WDT Scandal Part II was promise by Smuft and Elky that the winner of WDT travel to Korea and receive a spot on a proteam. Obviously, this generated large sums of money in signups, as every 2003 version of Combat-Ex and LastShadow ponied up $20 to prove their mad skills. But not only did Smuft and Elky take back this promise, but they weren't going to tell the winner until after he arrived in Korea. Oh, how much TLGG wishes it were present during that conversation.
If you want to read more about ilnp and WDT, the TL Search Function will show you the way. Will Idra walk the ilnp road or play it straight? Only time will tell.

TheTyranny of the Edit

TheTyranid was banned yesterday by EvilTeletubby. Was this a helpful cleansing that will improve TL.net, or was it an injustice committed by a trigger-happy Mod? Time for a TLGG Ban Review™.

1. He was banned because he said something offensive!
First, we don’t know the content of the post. It was edited. Yes, TL has a tradition of Moderator discretion, but transparency and legitimate reasons fosters trust among the forum population. A post edit feature is for simple, easy corrections to your posts, but also to take back or remove stuff said in the heat of the moment. Users that self-police make the jobs of the Moderators easier. Why ban someone who edited out something offensive? Doesn’t this show that the user is one who thinks about what he writes and clearly cares about what other members read? If we’re going down the road of banning based on edits, does that mean Mods will now check all edited posts for ban-able content?

2. It’s only a two-day temp ban! What’s the big deal?
TheTyranid was a 2000+ post user and a very worthwhile contributor. Not sure if ETT knew this, but TheTyranid diligently created four Results and Standings threads, all in the Articles (previously Featured Threads) forum:

OGN Star Challenge Season 1 (Feb. 08)
MBCGame Survivor Season 1 (Feb. 08)
MBCGame Survivor Season 3 (Nov. – Dec 07)
OGN Dual Tournament Season 3 (Dec. 07 – Jan 08)

In addition, TheTyrannid has 12+ OPs in the Tourneys forum under his belt. It seems like he was on the fast track for a star icon, not a nuke symbol. Is this how TL.net thanks its contributors? Shouldn’t these threads earn TheTyranid at the very least a PM warning instead of a quick thoughtless ban? Don’t we want him to make more threads like these instead of treating him like any other bad poster? The Men in Red always talk about treating veterans with respect. Here is a perfect example of when leniency and respect should be given. Instead, a veteran and contributor is banned because of his "unwarranted tone" in an edited post.

3. Moderators should ban people that start conflicts!
Was this really a bad user starting an unnecessary fight? This appreciation thread was just another excuse to heap praise on Much for embarrassing FBH, an outlet for impotent Savior fanboys whose Maestro can’t even take revenge for himself. TheTyranid throws himself in front of the bandwagon and predictably gets run over. Don’t the moderators want passion like his? At TLGG we love drama, but even at TL should encourage it when the love and hate is about StarCraft. TL.net should want its fans to cheer for their favorite progamers and hate on their enemies. That’s what fans do! Stifling that makes the forums (gasp) boring.

So the next time you think of creating a tourney OP or R&S thread, think about the poor Tyranid and his futile edits. And remember, from now on, edit your posts twice.

UPDATE 08:30 PDT: TheTyrannid's temp ban has been shortened. Since only Administrators, not Moderators, can unban users, direct your applause to one of TL.net's active Admins: FakeSteve[TPR], Kennigit, Manifesto7, or Sonuvbob.

Middle-Aged Father vs Fat Guy

Drama. Flaming. Controversy. It's TLGG's favorite time of the year: WCG USA, where hack accusations flow like $2 beers during happy hour and extra thread pages appear as if out of thin air.

In case you forgot, Louder qualified for a WCG USA Regional by whining for a walkover when G5 took a bathroom break. Moral of the story, WCG USA participants: pee before you play. Of course, the past is the past and our mature, level-headed WCG USA participants will just forgive and forget, won't they? Maybe not. Let's cut through the boring stuff and get to the insults.

Time for a TLGG Flame Report™!

Incontrol says:

"... smashing my head on the table ... at what louder said."
"Is anyone else raising your children?"
"Its scummy and stupid no matter how you splice it."
"You are trying hard to be a dick."
"... lecturing me on my debate skills WHICH I NEVER BRAG ABOUT"
"... ignored by your very fucking blunt head ..."
"... don't spoon feed an alligator, you'll get bitten."
"... why he has lil goonies like you posting on forums ..."

Incontrol final score: +2

+2 for "to-the-next-level" insult about someone's kids
+1 for inadvertent penis pun
+1 for animal kingdom metaphor
-1 for excessive debate skill defense
-1 for generic profanity and excessive capitalization

Louder says:

"... attack-dog-geoff will never pass up a chance to be a douchebag."
"Mister logician ..."
"Right debate wizard?"
"... your complete inability to comprehend what you read ..."
"... your response will be fitting for a Bill O'Reilly talking point?"
"... your 'ability' to argue is based on hyperbole and straw men."
"Do they not teach you about logical fallacies, champion debater?"

Louder final score: +3

+2 for persistent nickname use
+1 for indirect irl nerd insult
+1 bonus for induced insecurity
-1 for invoking republicans

Louder wins over Incontrol, 3-2. Will this be GG NO RE or will we have a Round 2 soon?

What If Artosis Didn't Cast TSL?

Artosis got a broadcast job with IEG in Korea after showcasing his casting skills during the TSL. His announcement thread is all love from the community, with the exception of a few snarky Klazart jokes. Remember Klazart? He's the talented caster from the commentary site SC2GG. Though he only casts on YouTube, he is widely considered Tasteless' biggest rival.

Artosis is the second TL.net forum member to get a casting job in Korea (after Tasteless, of course). For those keeping score at home:

TL.net : 2
SC2GG: 0

A question: why does a website that is solely dedicated to producing quality VOD commentary have such a hard time sending a member to Korea for casting? No Korean connections? Sub-par casting skill? Ladder abuse?

A source tells us that Diggity, another SC2GG caster, was set to cast TSL before the big TL-SC2GG fight over Baezzi. While Diggity is no Klazart, if Diggity casted TSL, would he be the one in Korea now?
I guess we'll never know!

Savior a CJ Shirt for Me

TL's admins say the CJ Entus shirts go on sale soon, but will all users get a fair shot? A confidential source indicates our friends in MiR are saving a bunch, perhaps for their friends, perhaps for a rainy day?

Keep your eyes on the news because there's money to be made, buy a CJ shirt and resell at several times the value. We can't let the Mods make all the cash now can we?